I had a lot of the same qualms for quite a while, disagreeing when everyone around me considered slash by it's very nature to be feminist, worrying that I was fetishizing and culturally appropriating gay men. And I still don't honestly know about this whole slash thing, but I think I'm getting an idea. And this post of yours has definitely helped. Mind if I link over here when I flesh out this idea of mine, to show from whence the inspiration came?